Good day to everyone. Another attempt to write tanka while participating in Colleen’s #TankaTuesday challenge where the rules are to to write in any of the 24 syllabic forms of Japanese poetry using a kigo or season word as an inspiration. While there are 24 seasons in Japan, we are allowed to use season words as per our region.
I hope I have understood the rules ๐
I belong to India and the monsoon season is still lingering around, although I believe it has begun its, albeit belated, withdrawal.
a monsoon shower –
hanging on the long clothesline
sparkling diamonds
thieves break-in to find my cache
of dripping garments
So monsoon is my kigo. While the tanka is not exactly 5/7/5/7/7 syllables, I believe a total of 31 syllables or less is also acceptable. Am I right? Did this work? I also wasnt sure if I was supposed to include the image. Would love to know your thoughts, comments and suggestions.
Thanks for visiting and reading. Have a super day.
Good Morning Dahlia. I liked your Tanka.
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Thanks so much Ferdi๐ซ
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Oooh I did enjoy your clever Tanka…
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Thanks you๐
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Iโm never sure about the rules of tanka either! As far as the visual aspect goes, I think it would be better written as a poem, simply in five lines. The separate blocks I thought at first were links to posts. If you were to add just one extra two-syllable word (adjective/adverb) to the final line, I think youโd have the right syllable count per line.
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Noted with many thanks ๐
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xxx
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Liked reading your Tanka
Thanks
Chinnulu
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Thanks Chinnulu ๐
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Welcome. Iโm so glad you jumped into the challenge. Yes! This tanka is wonderful! I love the first three lines, and then you talk about the thieves breaking in to discover your wet clothes hanging on the line. Itโs totally unexpected! I love how you captured the monsoon. I created a sheet you can download and print to add your kigo words. You should add โmonsoonโ to this list for autumn weather. If you need help, let me know. ๐งก
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I will surely do so. Many thanks for your warm welcome and ovely comments.๐๐
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Nice poem. It is raining heavily at my place and I will find some diamonds tomorrow.
Cheers..
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๐ Cheers
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a lovely image; the last two lines are startling —
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Thanks John!
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Nice tanka, Dehlia ๐ I could see the dripping clothes.
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Thanks ๐
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Creative poem that has powerful imagery in it.
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Thanks so very much msjadeli ๐
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Dahlia, you’re welcome ๐
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โค๏ธNice blog. I started following him. I hope you also follow my blog and WE GROW TOGETHER BY INTERACTING. Greetings from the south of Spain ๐ฏ
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Thanks. Looking forward to it ๐
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I enjoyed this, Dahlia ~ the last two lines in particular made me smile!
โค
David
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Thanks so very much Ben๐๐
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You are very welcome!
BTW, please feel free to call me ‘David’. That’s my name. The word ‘ben’ simply means ‘son of’ in Hebrew, and my father’s name was ‘Alexander’. I created my blog in his memory, you see.
I know it’s confusing because is a popular name in English. I’m sorry for the confusion!
Much love,
David
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Ah I see. Thanks David๐
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A wonderful tanka. I enjoyed the sensory details and the humor. ๐
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Thank you so much๐๐
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