Chapter 149: A Matter of Perspective

Arnav picked up her hand and kissed it, he shook his head helplessly, “I don’t know Khushi, how you manage to forgive me, every single time!” he shrugged, “I shudder to think how mean and down right cruel I have been to you right from the beginning. Even before the misunderstanding, again and again. The way I dropped you from the first floor, the way I manhandled you when you said ‘character dheela hai’ to me,” He shook his head, “Pata nahi if I would have been able to forgive you if I had been in your place.”

Khushi caressed his cheek, “Love does not need a reason does it? You also fell in love with me knowing that I was ‘characterless’, didn’t you?” she taunted softly.

“Haan,” Arnav nodded his head, “But I am talking about forgiveness and acceptance, I did ‘fall in love’ but I did not forgive you or accept you did I, you tried to repeatedly convince me that you were not involved with Shyam, and in fact I could have easily checked up your story by just asking a few questions to your mother or Buaji, but I preferred to go with my instincts, and continue to disbelieve you!” he looked at her, his face awash with emotions, “And you, what do you do in return, you put your life and reputation at stake to save me, how can you do this Khushi?” he shook his head in wonder, “Sometimes I really feel humbled by your love; if I had been in your place I would have probably jumped on my high horse and stayed put, conveniently ignored any sort of signal that you might be in trouble, how can you do this Khushi?” he asked again, then regretfully, “Shayad mere pyaar main hi kuch kami hai.”

Khushi was silent for a while, she swallowed and then said, “Nahi aisa nahi hai Arnav, hume bharosa hai, aap par, aapke pyaar par, but theory and practical of love is different, hum sochte kuch hain, aur kartein kuch aur hai, you also may think, you may not be able to forgive me, who knows what you may have done, if the situation had arisen?” she smiled tremulously at him.

He looked at her and then regretfully shook his head, “No Khushi, I really don’t think I can match your generosity of spirit and heart. I have no doubt, agar tumne mere saath yeh sab kiya hota; I seriously doubt if I would have ever been able to move on.”

Khushi smiled her brilliant smile, her face glowing even in the dim light of the poolside, and said wisely, “Aapko pata hai, aisa kyon hai? That is because you hold on to your negative experiences and emotions rather than the positive ones. You cling on to all the bad things that have happened to you, conveniently forgetting and discounting all the blessings that DM did shower on you inspite of it all. Zindagi main woh mehtvapoorn nahi hai ki aapko kya mila aur kya nahi, mehtvapoorn woh hai ki aap kis cheez ko mehtva dete hain.”

He looked at her quizzically but she nodded her head firmly, “Jo bhi hua aapke saath, isme koi shaq nahi ki bahut bura hua, par aapne kabhi yeh nahi socha, kam se kam, Di ka pyaar toh aapke saath, Nani chattan ke tarah khadi rahi aapke saath, Mamiji ne aapka poora saath diya, yahan tak ki apna gehna bhi bech diya, given her nature, she could have easily objected to having a couple of orphans thrust upon her, even if she was forced by Nani to accept you, she could have made your life miserable with her constant taunts, which we all know exactly how much she is capable of, and Mamaji, the constant steady father figure acting as the sheet anchor. Yeh sab bhool gaye aap?” She questioned him gently.

He swallowed and looked away.

She fell silent for a while, “Humare saath bhi achcha nahi hua, I too miss my parents, but I will always be grateful to Devi Maiyya for giving me Babuji, Amma, Buaji and Jiji, agar woh nahi hote toh,” she swallowed hard, “Devi Maiyya ne hamesha humara dhyan rakha, aur hume unse koi shikayat nahi hai; instead I am deeply indebted to her.”

Arnav looked at her with an unfathomable expression, “Really koi shikayat nahi hai? Teen naam wala rakshash bhejne ke liye bhi nahi?”

Khushi smiled mistily at him, “Uske liye toh bilkul bhi nahi, kyonki hum unse bahut pyaar kartein hain, aur aap unke saath bhi wohi galati kar rahe hain jo humne shuru main kiya tha.”

Arnav looked at her questioningly, “Kaun si galti.”

“What you see, what you remember, what you forget and what you understand,” Khushi listed his ‘galtis’.

Arnav looked even more confused.

She smiled and held his hand, “Aapko yeh yaad hai ki ASR ne hume parking lot main bhej diya, yeh nahi yaad, ki hume bachane bhi wohi wapas aaye the. Aapko yaad hai ki gusse main ASR sent me to the guest house, par hume toh bas yeh yaad hai ki ASR wahan par aaye aur apne jaan par khel kar hume bachaya. You remember the way you manhandled me when I accused you of being character dheela,” she rubbed her wrist and smiled a secret smile, and looked at him mischievously, “You were so angry and I knew I had crossed a line and was terrified of the repercussions, but you let me go so easily, kya hua? The mighty cruel heartless Arnav Singh Raizada couldn’t bear the sight of my tears? Itna asan hai harana teen naam wala rakshash ko?” she jeered softly.

Arnav flushed and looked away, “You always twist things out of context and put your own interpretations to events aur apna matlab nikal leti ho, regardless of whether they exist or not.”

Khushi laughed, delighted at his embarrassment at being caught, “Oh really, apna matlab, toh aap hi bata dijiye us din why did you rush to save me from getting burnt rather than save Lavanya from falling down?”

Arnav looked at her and protested, “Aisa kuch nahi hai Khushi, I didn’t notice that Lavanya was about to fall, otherwise don’t flatter yourself, I would have saved her,” he declared rather haughtily.

Khushi clapped her hands, “Wohi toh hum pooch rahe hain, how come you didn’t notice that Lavanya was about to fall but manage to see that I might get hurt? Too busy ogling me eh?”

Arnav looked at her ruefully, “Imp,” he muttered checkmated.

Khushi smiled and continued, “Hum kabhi nahi bhool payenge how at the Sangeet ceremony how the mighty Arnav Singh Raizada so casually threw away his chance to win the bet, just because I was in trouble. You remember how you deliberately humiliated me and forced me to say sorry while holding my ears, I just remember your stunned expression when you got to know about my engagement; you remember and regret that you didn’t hug me at the hospital, I remember and celebrate that you came, you came despite being so angry with me; you call yourself egoistic and spout all that stuff about aukat and money, but you gave in so easily when you saw your brother loved Jiji, so much so you were willing to shake hands with the enemy; you yelled at me at the dhaba and left me alone at night in the darkness, yes, but everytime I remember how you cared for me, tended to me, bashed up those goons,” she clutched his hand tightly and dropped a soft kiss on his hand, “Aapko pata hai, I am willing to undergo that horrible night again and again, if only you would come in the end,” she looked at Arnav, who sat staring at her with his lips twisted, “Khushi,” he said huskily, Khushi put a finger to his lips and shook her head, “Humari baat abhi khatam nahi hui hai.”

She leaned against him and began speaking softly again, “Whenever I think of you, I remember how you didn’t let Di know I had thrown the hot tea at you, probably knowing Di would never forgive me, how you took the blame for the flower vase, how you paid the hospital bills when it was entirely uncalled for, how at the airport, despite your anger and disgust, you protected me against the jostling crowds, the way you switched off the AC because I was feeling cold; amma buaji couldn’t make out how upset I was but you, you noticed and came to save me and prevented me from jumping off the roof,” her voice sank to a whisper, “That is what I remember, that is what I hold dear and close to my heart, not just that you lost your temper and often unjustifiably, but that you deeply regret it and bother to make amends.”

Arnav squeezed her hard, swallowed and said a bit flippantly, “That is called a selective memory.”

“Aisa nahin hai Arnav, that hum kuch bhi bhool gaye hain, hume aapke saath bitya hua ek ek pal yaad hai, and neither have I forgiven you for all these transgressions,” she punched him, “And in fact whenever you hurt me, all these memories are revived, and saare zakham taaza aur hare ho jaate hain and they all cumulatively cause pain and anguish, par ultimately, I focus only on the positives, that is my nature and my blessing, for I believe, what matters in life is ki aap kis cheez ko ahmiyat dete hain, jo aapke paas hai, ya phir jo nahi.”

“Not bad Khushi Kumari Gupta Singh Raizada,” Arnav murmured softly, love shining in his eyes, “not just Sanka Devi huh?” Khushi blushed and hid her face in his shoulder, Arnav hugged her and thanked his stars, “I am proud of you Khushi, main koshish karoonga tumhare tarah sochne ki, and I hope you will too,” he spoke to their child, “If Abhimanyu could learn warfare while in the womb, why not life skills?”

“Abhimanyu!” Khushi was impressed.

Arnav’s lips twisted as he shrugged, “Yeah, Dadi used to tell me all these stories as a child, I had pushed away all the memories,” he looked at her tenderly, “perhaps it is time to unlock the vault, for who knows what treasures I may find?”

Khushi reached out and hugged him too full of emotions to say anything more.


Click here for Chapter 150

18 thoughts on “Chapter 149: A Matter of Perspective”

  1. I got lost inbetween because my Hindhi is very very poor.

    But like khushi said, i took away the english parts and was able to figure out what they were talking out..

    He is willing to think like Khushi. A good beginning for ASR.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Think like Khushi… I don’t think so.
    I find reading Hindi dialogue written in English a bit difficult to read and tend to skip over it. And to think that I learned Hindi in school. (It was my second language) I can read write speak and understand Hindi well. I just find it too much hard work when it is written in the English alphabet. Weird isn’t it?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Funnily enough I agree with you. I often have given up on arshi stories because of this very reason and here I am doing the same damn thing. Blame it on the demand for ‘flavor’ The last time also I got some flak for this Hindi business and even went so far as to include English translations for the pages where there was too much Hindi. But I have to admit it was rather a tedious task and was more than happy to cheat. Although I wasnt planning to include the translations in this version but perhaps I will considering the fifty percent swing in favor of it. That is for the chapters which already have it!


      1. Actually, Dahlia, I should not complain. Your use of Hindi in this story is not bad as it is interspaced with English. Sometimes it is not easy to translate. We do not speak pure form(Like Khushi did in the serial).In our house, we speak Gujarati with a lot of English and Swahili words.
        So let it be. It is only a problem when the whole conversation or paragraph is in Hindi(written in English )


  3. You have the most lovely insightful understanding of what makes these two tick. Arnav needs the crutch of anger to spur him forward. His acceptance of his emotional shortcomings is hopefully a step in the right direction. Not holding my breath though… Raat gayi baat gayi is more him, no?

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Not just a Sanka Devi indeed! She is indeed the most suljha hua and samajhdar person there is. You know I have always had trouble believing people who were “too good” or had “no faults”. Maybe because I am myself full of them. But, the way you have presented Khushi, I can say with complete confidence, that people like her exist in asli duniya too (for it is not possible to pen someone so beautifully and yet with such reality, unless you are someone like that too (forgive my presumptiousness)). You have taught me some important life skills here!

    I can relate to Arnav more than anything with this chapter, you know? Like Arnav, I too have trouble believing someone could be so pure, so good at everything without any vices. Someone who has such a positive world view that it is just not possible to be “logical” about it. Ab jo dimaag ko samajh nahi raha, woh kaise accept kar le? I have no right to absolve him of all his injustices, but I understand him now. Much better than I did before. And it is weird that reading a chapter on Khushi’s perspective helped me understand and perhaps forgive Arnav. I know this story is mostly written from khushi’s perspective possibly because you relate to her more, but your Arnav is the most relatable character for me, what with all his flaws! I doubt, even the writers of the show psychoanalyzed him as much as I have while reading your story.

    Thank you, this story is precious. I keep coming back to read it just because it gives me the distinct satisfaction, almost akin to what one would get when they indulge in comfort food after dieting for ages. 😛

    Liked by 2 people

    1. What a beautiful expansive comment – I shall treasure it and keep coming back to it. Thank you. No vices is not possible. Plus a matter of perspective again. And I do believe there can be something as being too good. You end up being trampled upon and taken for granted. A judicious mix of vice and goodness is imperative for a wholesome existence 😀

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Yes! He probably morbidly enjoys his guilt trips and maudlin bouts because that gives him a moral high and allows him the freedom to be as ASR as possible because woh aisa hi hai🙄😅

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Oh come on! He can’t win can he? If he’s not guilty… He’s charged. If he is guilty… He’s charged of enjoying his guilt? Cut him some slack. He loves. In the only way he knows how.

        Liked by 2 people

      3. Eggactly! Waise woh shatir hai yeh uski soch hai – even the most diehard fan can only nod in sympathetic understanding rather than agreement 😛

        Liked by 2 people

      4. Perhaps he’s only highly illogical when it comes to his personal life because it doesn’t deal with cold hard facts and figures and emotions. Maybe his lack of emotional quotient is what makes him a force to reckon with in the business world. After all, a world of no weaknesses, isn’t it?
        Dekho rationalize karna hai toh main kuch bhi rationalize kar sakti hu. How do you think I procrastinate as much as I do?

        Liked by 2 people

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