Stumped

claire-sheldon
Photo (c) Claire Sheldon

Stumped

Words: I plead guilty

 “Why did you call the office landline?” She kicked off her heels.

“You weren’t picking your mobile…” He straightened the penguin.

“I was in an important meeting…!” Her bag was next.

“It was a question of our son’s future.” He fiddled with the pen stand.

“What if you were in a meeting? Would you also have left it?”

“Of course! I know my priorities.”

“Then why didn’t you check the admission papers before leaving?”

“Why didn’t you?”

“If I have to do everything, what will you do?”

“Put the blame on you.” He grinned.

“Very smart.” She seethed.

“I am glad you agree.” He smirked.

“I wonder you can say that after today’s fiasco.”

“I am not such a fool as you.”

“Are you calling me the fool?” She clenched her fists.

“I chose you. You chose me. So who’s the fool?”

 ***

A/N I overshot the word limit heavily but with a purpose – a bit of any experiment really. And I would appreciate your help. It’s about the dialogue tag. I used the first one (she kicked off her heels) to denote who’s speaking. And then I felt like adding a few more and ultimately went overboard. But I am not sure if they worked or not. In fact I think it didnt add, perhaps even detracted. But this is something that I have been wrestling with. Also is it okay to use just one dialogue tag? Wouldnt it have looked odd? Questions, questions and I am quite stumped 😉

What do you think? Could I request you to read it again minus the dialogue tags and let me know your thoughts? But I understand that you may be too busy. Thanks a lot for visiting – have a great day 🙂

 

Stumped

“Why did you call the office landline?” She kicked off her heels.

“You weren’t picking your mobile…”

“I was in an important meeting…!”

“It was a question of our son’s future.”

“What if you were in a meeting? Would you also have left it?”

“Of course! I know my priorities.”

“Then why didn’t you check the admission papers before leaving?”

“Why didn’t you?”

“If I have to do everything, what will you do?”

“Put the blame on you.”

“Very smart.”

“I am glad you agree.”

“I wonder you can say that after today’s fiasco.”

“I am not such a fool as you.”

“Are you calling me the fool

“I chose you. You chose me. So who’s the fool?”

 ***

Written for Friday Fictioneers – a story in 100 words or less. Thanks to Rochelle for hosting the challenge and Claire Sheldon for the photo prompt. To read the other stories inspired by this prompt click here.

For readers of Moonshine, here's Chapter 154

Thanks for visiting, have a great day 🙂